One Deep Breath prompt for week: one line Haiku
Old Age
Days shorten our souls lengthen to join as shadows.
MeeAugraphie 03/26/07
Note:
These words are mine.
Please, do not use them without my permission.
You are welcome, however, to link back to them.
Meeaugraphie
16 comments:
Lovely image and concept. Like the ambiguity created without punctuation to show if days shorten, or shorten our souls. Both true.
Days shorten our souls lengthen to join as shadows.
You've got a lot in your few words there. Excellent and very true.
I always think of my wife, when I read such poems as yours. Thanks.
This was just so lovely...
Beautifully done. I can sense a touch of pathos in the shadows reference and yet great joy as well. One of the best I've seen so far.
Pearl - I am glad you picked up on the ambiguity.
Crafty Green Poet - Age has a way of stating facts. (is that another one?)
Brian - Wives have some things in common, anytime I can put someone's wife in their thoughts I am happy. Now if my husband would just read this and I could jump in his thoughts. . . (oh, hi, Leon!)
Regina Clare Jane - I'm trying to learn the short and sweet, your comment is a good example for me! Your expression in your photo is great!
Ron - pathos and joy - that is old age, isn't it! oops, OLDER age. . .
Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment on my poem. Less is more is something only recent to me, I am, by nature, extremely wordy, so for y'all to get my words I realize I am spouting in the right direction, but do expect wordiness to creep back often!
beautiful and unspoilt by punctuation
one of my favourites of the week so far
Gerald England - I had to fight the urge to use punctuation, it nearly won, but once I took it out, I realized what I had actually said.
Thank you, also, for reading my poem and commenting.
a gorgeous ku and pic
You've done something special here. You've spotted something, and made the connections and written about it simply but well. Good stuff.
Mandy - The view was just incredible.
Jem - That picture has spoken to me since the day he took it. Oops, I'm so used to taking all the photos, I didn't give him credit!
Thank you, both, for reading my poem and commenting.
Such power and depth in this haiku. You captured so much with so little. Very nice!
Great idea and line!
I definitely feel this one in my soul...just beautiful!
Getzapped - My poetry group would take credit for the so little, they've had a long road to cut my wordiness, and even then, it's only occasional.
Sandy - It was the photo that gave me the idea.
Becca - I am so glad you feel it.
Thanks y'all for reading and commenting on my poem.
Sublime.
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