10.4.07

Poetry Thursday - Soccer, a game made in Heaven

I am early, but felt the time was right. The "rules" this time on Poetry Thursday were not made to be broken: I bent them a tad bit, by choosing one line I loved, as stated, and then adding several contiguous lines on either side.

I could not resist, this group of lines spoke to me. I knew not of what -- until my fingers touched the keys. Along with my greatest respect for their brilliant lines, I ask they each forgive me for the poetic license I took with this poem. I give you, with the borrowed lines formed as links back to their original authors, my interpretation:


Soccer, A Game Made in Heaven


He lied with some skill that night,
(to his bride)
"Forever, you once said and forever
I shall stay"

Hell clapped furiously - in pride.

"There are no fragile dogs in heaven,
no blushing brides nor stalwart men,
nor babes in arms nor purring cats."

"See,
they
hide their fangs behind,"
the devil shouted,
his neck still craned
to see above the flames,
goggles on, as he was tiring
from the smoke that kept him
from clearly seeing his life's work:

"Forever," bride once said
"Forever," groom once said
and like some monstrous creature
(of habit)

they raced together to break
their vows first as
the evening held its breath

and then


He lied with some skill that night
and hell clapped furiously - in pride
and angels continued
planting
lettuces in the dark
and playing soccer on the rim.

"Score!"
one angel cried, as his
lettuce landed square in Hell's fire
and smoke screened the devil's view,

but

he only tightened his goggles,
as the evening held its breath,
and then

the devil watched
as someone else took up the gauntlet:

"There are no fragile dogs in heaven,
no blushing brides nor stalwart men,
nor babes in arms nor purring cats."

He lied with some skill that night
and hell clapped furiously - in pride. . . .

MeeAugraphie
04/08/07

Those words not italicized are mine. Those italicized belong to their original authors, used with permission through Poetry Thursday. They are not meant to be used without permission given by us all. So, read, enjoy, but let the words remain here! And while you are reading this, click on the other links, read their poetry. . . Plenty more wonderful phrases at each of their sites!

14 comments:

pepektheassassin said...

This is really cool! Thanks for dropping by, and for using my line so cleverly! :)

Marcia said...

Pepektheassassin: Thank you."Cool" is still in my vocabulary, too.

Tina With Wings said...

Woah, this is really lovely! You use the lines so creatively- I absolutely love this!

chocolate covered musings said...

BLOODY CLEVER! I *love* it!

Rose Dewy Knickers said...

Marcia, what an original use of the lines and a fantastic poem you have created. An instant classic to be sure.

Rose

xo

Marcia said...

Tina with wings - Chocolate covered musings - Rose Dewey Knickers- Thank y'all! I have to admit it feels awesome that y'all are commenting favorably on this one, it's one of those "please-let-people- like-it-because-it-felt-so-right-maybe -it-is-too-weird-etc. etc. etc. . . ."

Brian said...

You have such a vivid and fertile imagination. Must be the climate. ;)

Marcia said...

Brian, I am quite sure it must be the climate - and empty nester syndrome - and making up for lost time - but mostly: the ability to put off until next life the things other consider a normal daily routine. Thanks, Brian, seriously,as I am sure you've noticed, I don't always have an imagination, this was more of a fluke, but I'll take the occasional good feeling it gets over daily doldrums any day.

Crafty Green Poet said...

This is so much fun, i love the angels planting lettuces while playing soccer.

Marie said...

How clever! I enjoyed every drop... thanks for sharing.
Marie

Rethabile said...

Fun all the way. It sings.

Marcia said...

Crafty Green Poet - I have to admit the lettuce as soccer balls made me incredibly happy it popped out of my brain. My husband tried to squash that image, saying there is already smoke in Hell (historically), but I assured him that the lettuce was precisely why! LOL. Thank you for commenting.

Marie - Glad you enjoyed it down to the last drop. Thank you for commenting.

Remiman said...

Marcia,
Incredibly fluid, Just the way inspirational writng should be. This came off with pizzaz.
I liked it all, while___"they raced together to break
their vows first as
the evening held its breath"
JUMPED out to me.
rel

Clockworkchris said...

Marcia, this poem was fantastic. Such a flow and great use of diction. I loved the ideas you incorporated that made your "breaking of the rules" such fun. Everything spoke to me and I especially liked the lettuce and smoke as well as everyone else. My favorite line was "There are no fragile dogs in heaven, no blushing brides nor stalwart men, nor babes in arms nor purring cats." I refuse to believe there are no purring cats in heaven. I think there are even big lions, tigers, and bears that are friendly and like a good rub down.


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