21.5.07

Haiku - Viewpoint - Empathy View, Multiplied

One Deep Breath's Haiku prompt this week: Viewpoint


Empathy View, Multiplied


Empathy attracts
your past pain and his sorrow
weigh heavily here

~~~~

Grounds keeper gathered
trampled soil of heavy heart
mixed with fallen tears

~~~~

Your tears flood my heart
finger in dam does not work
floodgates are opened

~~~~

Clouds hurl hard spit balls
at hapless souls walking home
just one more insult

~~~~

Bittersweet breezes
slam headfirst into sun rays
confusion reigns proud

~~~~

MeeAugraphie
05/21/07


Enjoy my words if you can, but please do not copy without permission. Thank you.

10 comments:

Tammy said...

These were all really powerful but that second one touched my heart. Well done.

Regina Clare Jane said...

Very powerful poetry for today. Like Tammy, I found the second one very compelling...

Marcia said...

Tammy, Regina Claire Jane - I am glad you both found something in the second one - there are several possible meanings there. Thank you both for commenting.

Clockworkchris said...

I also liked the second one. The floodgates and dam reminded me of my poem the other day. I liked the spit balls a lot. That was ingenius. So the fourth is my favorite. Wonderful Haiku.

Marcia said...

Yes, Chris, I must have had your poems in mind. I have to admit I can't believe I came up with the spitball thing, I was trying to describe pea sized hail without using pea. . heehee. Thank you for the use of ingenious, I may never hear it again, so I will hold on to it for awhile.

Remiman said...

Marcia,
I read an abundance of saddness here, with resolution just out of sight, but sensed. Powerful.
rel

quietpaths said...

These all are jewels. The third one pulls out images from my memories quite strongly. The hail imagery of the fourth is awesome. Well done...

Marcia said...

Rel - I am glad you felt there was some sense of resolution. I wanted to throw a happy one in there, but just couldn't, once I got on the roll I was on. The bittersweet breezes was as close as my mind would let me!

Quietpaths - I can identify with the third one, too.

Thank you both for commenting.

Patois said...

They were all quite lovely, but I am so drawn to the first one. Collectively, they are so powerful.

Marcia said...

Patois - I am glad you were drawn to the first, it was the key, for me, to them all, empathy can be painful and heartbreaking in varying degrees. Thank you for commenting.


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