13. Tears - Thinking Blogger Award

This poem was prompted by both a success and failure all tied into one part of living, ironic how something that brings such joy can bring so much personal frustration and also the aura around me that I am ungrateful, when in reality it is that I am so grateful I try too hard to make my reply perfect, and take the responsibility of the tag so much to heart, I begin a search to find someone who has NOT been tagged, so they, too, could get the thrill I got! I get so lost in their words, I forget I am searching and continue the search and get lost again. It is a personality flaw, and when I try to see the positive in it, I realize how many wonderful words I got to read in my search. But reality is, well, I don't need to tell you, it is here on the internet for all to see. You would think after 57 years and 14 days, I would get it right. Thank goodness I have nearly 57 more years to try!

The ironic thing, is Shelly tagged me first, noting my poetry, and linked to this blog, Shelby just tagged me as her favorite word tumbler, and linked to Tumbled Words, one of my other blogs she reads. So, I guess y'all believe I think, but will realize I just don't know how to act! And they are both writers I read every word of, and take to heart. I originally wrote thanking Shelly, now, to thank Shelby at Time With Shelby.

Shelby, the blinding glow around me just got brighter, all the words I wrote on MeeAugraphie, I repeat for you. I could not write them better or different for my heart is still my heart in the link below.

I am posting the words I originally wrote, but was holding on to until I figured out how to add the "Award" so the tagged writers would be able to get theirs. . . I tried for hours to figure it out, most links here someone has configured already. I even emailed someone (not the "She's", begging for help, but have not yet received it. . . So, without the tags yet given, I throw aside my perfectionist that lives deep inside and comes out at the worst possible times, without the link, I am now posting my incomplete post here: I still suck at this!

The poem inspired by all this.

Tears


Sunshine rain bounces
off my stomach into my heart

Light Rain trickles gently
down my cheek

Ice rain pelts my face,
bounces from my heart

Hot rain burns
my skin, inflames my mind

Monsoon rain blows
through my scalp into my brain


MeeAugraphie
04/13/07

I guard my words as much as I share them. Please, if you love them, if they speak to you, share them, but acknowledge they came from my heart, especially these. Thanks.

REMEMBER TO FOLLOW THE LINK ABOVE!

Ok, so it has been days, I'm STILL Bouncing

Written on time, posted so, so, so late: a most unpleasant trait, I'm working to correct. . . (in between poems and spouting). . . .

I am speechless. . . Ok, that is an out and out lie! I am never speechless, although there are actually times I hold words back intentionally. But this is not the time for holding back, it is too exciting - and humbling - at the same time. But, then those two words do go together a lot, don't they? So, here goes:

As poets and/or writers we want to be heard, we want to be recognized, whether as a talented author or as someone who said something that made a difference.

It is making any kind of difference that drives most of us, if not all of us, whether making people laugh, saving someone from a major mistake, honoring someone special, just making someone feel, or the ultimate, leading someone to a better understanding of others.

And both in our efforts to accomplish any or all of that, we are brought to our knees so often, both from the humility of failure and by the humbleness that follows success. We need both to balance our lives -- in between -- we need that excitement of success.

For most of us it only takes the tiniest acknowledgment to keep us going. Comments from our readers carry us a loooong way.

Today, for me is special. For the moment I am still riding high on Shelly's (This Eclectic Life) including me in her double list of Thinking Bloggers. I admit it, there is a blinding glow around me, even though words normally tumble, they are nearly uncontrollable now, but I know myself well enough to know the humbleness is lurking beneath the surface, demanded to shove my excitement out of its way. But, if I am honest, today, excitement is fighting to keep its place. Indulge me, please. Humbleness will return, it always insists on returning, it won't let my head grow, just make me content someone understood my words and, also, make me think on a deeper level. Thank you, Shelly, for reading on and in between my lines.

Now comes the hard part, listing my five picks for a Thinking Blogger Award. Not only and I unorganized and a procrastinator, but making choices, well, in the guise of truth, "I suck at it." , "Thank you, Shelly, for including me -- and for forcing me to really think -- and I thought it would be an easy day."

I am still trying to choose between the many thinkers. As I told Shelly, I tend to remember words or feelings more than where I read them. I will post them soon!